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I wish it was as easy as just waking up every day and making the choice. I was a real-deal drug addict, you know? And it wasn't just some little cute habit that I had to kick.

“It takes a lot of work for me to stay sober. “ I was going to go to the grave before I ever got sober,” $crim says. After months of drug-induced psychosis, $crim committed to sobriety when he realized how much his habit was affecting his ability to relate to his cousin and team. Ruby and $crim have been struggling with opiate addiction since their teens but have gotten clean in the last few years.

In recent years, the duo had begun the labor of casting off these emotional weights.

No matter how much money they amassed, the two were still laden with the same burdens they had been when they first started their career together. Whether you find yourself listening to 2016’s I No Longer Fear the Razor Guarding My Heel (III) 2018’s I Want to Die In New Orleans, or almost any entry in the KILL YOURSELF continuum, you’ll find their material success hadn’t brought them much fulfillment. And lo and behold, I felt shittier than ever before,” $crim explains. “You think getting these plays, doing these tours, getting this recognition and this validity and fame, this is all going to make me feel good, right? And then you get it. They got together, made a pact to either succeed in music or kill themselves and became one of the most successful underground acts in recent memory but the goal of contentment still lay just out of reach. Their solution to these woes is firmly cemented in $uicideboy$' canon. Ruby’s bandmates didn’t have the same future-focused attitude as him, and $crim’s producing gig left him feeling taken advantage of. Ruby joined the band Vapo-Rats as their drummer, and $crim landed a job as an in-house producer for Universal/Republic, but something always managed to get in the way. Read more: You Can Look The Other Way: How house music is soundtracking Feral Girl Summerīefore starting $uicideboy$ in 2014, Ruby and $crim each attempted to find success in music separately. Dude coached my baseball teams and all that shit,” $crim adds.

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“I used to go with him when he worked side jobs in the free time he did have, working on cars. His father worked at a shipyard in Louisiana seven days a week and still dedicated his off time to pursuing greater financial security. to 5 p.m., and then go coach soccer for two hours afterward,” Ruby says. “I grew up seeing my dad work his ass off six days a week from 5 a.m. Ruby and $crim have never been strangers to hard work.

Even their “make-it-big-or-end-it-all” mythos was born of an unwavering commitment one that sought to ensure that every day would be one worth living to the fullest. There’s truth to that, but such a one-dimensional account denies the determination and hope that also resides in these two artists. Depression, anxiety, drug use and suicidal ideation are discussed frequently in their art and are commonly seen as the galvanizing forces that led to the creation of the group in the first place. That success is owed in no small part to their honest lyrics, creative sampling and nearly unparalleled output.ĭespite their probable status as your favorite SoundCloud rapper’s favorite SoundCloud rappers, the two have caught plenty of flak over the years for the content of their music. Nearly a decade later, $uicideboy$ are booming, as Ruby and $crim spun their internet fame into a life of touring and fruitful independent artistry. The two cousins cemented themselves as heroes of early SoundCloud and have grown well past the platform. have walked a long road since beginning $uicideboy$ in 2014. Aristos “Ruby da Cherry” Petrou and Scott “$crim” Arceneaux Jr. The sun won’t stop shining on $uicideboy$. With the release of their 47th project, they couldn’t be more proud of how far they’ve come.